Living Under Another Person’s Roof.

Last week we discussed things we need to do before offering accommodation to someone, I am sure we all learnt one or two things. Thank you so much for the experiences shared. We will be looking at the other side of the coin this week, what you need do if you are the one being assisted with accommodation.

Like we reiterated, we all need to be helped in one way or the other, the Creator of the Universe made it in such a way that we all need one another, in other words no man is an island, or do I say no man can be an island. We should be full of gratitude when offered accommodation, do not see it as a right or a duty (they owe you) even if the person is your relative, see it as a privilege and be grateful.

Once you move in, observe the way things are done in the place, watch the person’s values, ask questions politely if you are not clear about some things and do not assume anything. Do not take what is not given to you, if you need anything, seek their permission. Avoid being wasteful, if you are used to finishing a tin of milk once, watch how they use theirs and follow suite, in other words spare them the need of spending extra, rather look for ways you can help them save money. For example you can decide to put off the security light and others once it is 6.30am, this will help reduce the electricity bill of the house.

Please do not equate yourself with their children and become a rival to them, someone reported that her brother buys provision for his daughter anytime she is going to school, but he does not buy for her when she is resuming, this person failed to realize that it is not the brother’s duty to pay her school fees in the first place, (it is the parent’s duty) but because the parents could not afford it, he decided to help, I feel she should be grateful to him for taking up this responsibility, there are people out there with wealthy relatives who still find it difficult to paying school fees. You should correct the children with love, taking into consideration that you were once a child. Beating them is a delicate matter, so thread softly.

Help with house chores; do not wait for instructions before you do the needful. Regardless of your gender, (male or female), once you decide to put up under someone’s roof the first thing to do is swallow your pride, and do away with some preconceived notions (e.g. house chores is the duty of the female). If you are the first born in your own family, and you are exempted from chores, pocket that privilege and do the chores here. I know some will say they will take me as a slave or take me for granted, but I implore you to see this as a phase, and do whatever will bring peace to the home. Live with them in such a way that they will be sorry to see you leave.

Next time we will continue this discussion, meanwhile, if you are guilty of any of the above, apologize and turn a new leaf by putting into practice what you have learnt.

Dupe Oteri

relateandlive@yahoo.com,